Great Leaders Choose Their Words Wisely
By Rick Warren — 11/11/2026
“Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.” Ephesians 4:29 (NIV)
If you want to create change at school, at work, in your home, in your marriage, or in your relationships, the way you talk to others will make all the difference in the world.
When Nehemiah left his position as cupbearer to King Artaxerxes and traveled to Jerusalem to rebuild its walls, he knew he needed to identify with the people there. If he was going to get them on board with his plans, he needed to talk like an insider, not an outsider.
The Bible says, “You see the trouble we are in: Jerusalem lies in ruins, and its gates have been burned with fire. Come, let us rebuild the wall of Jerusalem, and we will no longer be in disgrace” (Nehemiah 2:17 NIV).
Notice Nehemiah said “us,” not “I.” He said “we,” not “me.” What was he doing with his words? He was building community. He didn’t point fingers and say, “I’m here to save the day and fix everything for you because you guys don’t even seem to care that you’re living in a heap of rubble.” No, he said, “This is our problem. And I know that, together, we can succeed because God is with us.”
When great leaders have a dream, they build a team. That’s what leadership is all about. Great leaders don’t show up and start blaming people. They accept responsibility.
There will be times in your life when you see a problem and have to choose between fixing the blame or fixing the problem. Anytime you blame others, you lower their motivation. When you focus on a solution instead, you increase people’s motivation.
Ephesians 4:29 says, “Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen” (NIV).
Great things happen when you unite people with your words and help them accomplish something they've always wanted to do, together.
Talk It Over
What is a daily interaction you have that would greatly benefit from using more “us” and “we” language?
When has God used “teamwork,” whether at your work, school, community, or home, to make a dream become a reality?
Read Psalm 3:3. How can this verse encourage you when people tear you down as you build a team to pursue a dream?
Will you follow Jesus today?
If you haven’t trusted in Jesus and committed to following him, why wait any longer? Pray this prayer:
“Dear Jesus, you have promised that if I believe in you, everything I’ve ever done wrong will be forgiven and you will accept me into your eternal home in heaven one day. I’m so grateful that I don’t have to earn or work for my salvation. It is a gift from God, through your sacrifice on the cross.
“I confess my sins, and I ask for your forgiveness. I believe you are my Savior. I receive you into my life as my Lord. Today I’m turning over every part of my life to your management. I want to use the rest of my life to serve you instead of serving myself. I commit my life to you and ask you to save me and accept me into your family. In Jesus’ name I pray. Amen.”
If you just prayed to accept Jesus, please email me at Rick@PastorRick.com and let me know. I’d like to send you some free materials to help you start your journey with Jesus.
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